Tuesday, June 21, 2011

Letters

I used to write letters to things and seasons, just to express my frustration with them. For example, between 2006-2007 I wrote the "Dear Winter" series, which basically consisted of the following:

"Dear Winter,

You really, really suck. Go away.

Love, me"

Since I'm frustrated with my current employment situation (read: lack thereof), I felt the need to compose the following.

---

Dear Telephone,

Please ring. For the love of God, please ring.

Love, me

Dear Prospective Employers,

Please check your email. For the love of God, please check your email.

Love, me

Dear Prospective Employers,

If "the position has already been filled", why the EFF is it still posted on your website?! Stop getting my hopes up. Sounds like whoever is in charge of keeping your website current isn't doing his or her job. Fire them and hire me!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHA!

Love, me


Dear Prospective Employers,

I'm seriously not (that) crazy. Please hire me.

Love, me

No comments:

Post a Comment

Tell me what you think. For serious.